"It another way of getting in touch with people that I just don't want to be bothered with." (on why she doesn't have an email account)
Scarlett Johansson
Scarlett Johansson
current VILLAGE IDIOT
Pamela Anderson
6 February 2010
Pam ready to jiggle. In a final career swan song Pamela Anderson has signed up to appear in the next season of "Dancing with the Stars". The show has "agreed to all terms for a deal" reports RadarOnline. In all this my thoughts go out to her future dance partner unless of course he can convince the judges that motor boating is an official dance move.
current MONTHLY MORON
more BLONDE MOMENTS
Britney Spears
30 January 2010 Idiot Status -
Hotel Britney. Since the end of her tour Brit Twit has spent her days wondering the hallways of LA hotel 'Mondrian' speaking in a British accent mimicking Stewie from 'Family Guy'. Britney has since decided to make the hotel her home, even though she lives just up the road, with a hotel source saying "She uses the gym, is waited on and she uses the babysitting service." In the old days celebrities at a hotel meant watching out for the odd TV hurled from a window, now-a-days you have rednecks speaking in British accent's while staff prevent their offspring from chewing electrical cord. Same drugs, lower standards.
Madonna
23 January 2010 Idiot Status -
Madonna wants a baby Jesus. 'The Sun' reports that Madonna has consulted with doctors about conceiving at the age of 51 with current toy boy Jesus aged 22. Madonna told friends that Jesus would be a "fantastic dad" and "I have endless love in my heart for another child." I reckon if Madonna and Jesus keep their current sex schedule of whenever-Jesus-is-drunk-enough/out-of-lunch-money, Madonna could give birth sometime late 2012. What do you know, the Mayans were right.
Sharon Stone
16 January 2010 Idiot Status -
Basic beauty tips. Sharon Stone has denied getting any plastic surgery to Tatler magazine saying "I have had zero, nothing done to myself: no lifting, no Botox, no injectables." Sharon went on to say "We get different faces as we go through our lives. If you try to hang on to the face you had when you were younger, you end up desperate." Deny, deny, deny. It's the Hollywood way. I'm not saying she needs surgery, all I'm saying is she won't have to spread her legs too far to reveal her career starter come Basic Instinct 8.
Courtney Love
9 January 2010 Idiot Status -
Love's legal losses. After loosing custody of her daughter last year it seems that Courtney will be back in court fighting American Express over credit card debt of $352,059.67. Hole lead singer Courtney is fighting back saying criminals ran up the bill after the cards were issued in her name without her consent. Courtney has given the police a description of the supposed criminals using her cards. Apparently they are about 10'' tall and answer to the names Jack and Daniels. I want to see who she'll call as a character witness in her defense?
Paris Hilton
2 January 2010 Idiot Status -
Paris wants to be even more sparkly. Always ready to pounce the dim witted Paris hurled herself at two Twilight producers while they were at West Hollywood eatery Mario's. Paris blurted out "Hi, I'm Paris Hilton, and I'd love to audition for one of the leads in your next sequel!" Paris carried on about how she would bring "lots of publicity" until one producer ended it saying "Thanks, but we have more than enough publicity as it is!" Thanks for the offer Paris but there are enough monsters as is in the series without your crotch critters.
celebrity QUOTES
"I'm not ashamed of being a bubbly, funny person. I think that's as valid as being the dark, brooding, tortured Oscar-nominated one."
Cameron Diaz
Cameron Diaz
"Everybody is a dumb blonde at heart."
Jessica Simpson
Jessica Simpson
"She loves Jay-Z and Missy Elliott. She just doesn't speak well enough just yet to mimic all the bad words. When she does, we'll have to switch to Will Smith." (on her daughter Apple's musical taste)
Gwyneth Paltrow
Gwyneth Paltrow
More: Celebrity Quotes
dumb BLONDE JOKES
A blonde called her boyfriend because she was having trouble putting a puzzle together and wanted him to come over and help her out, the boyfriend asked what it was supposed to be and she replied, the picture on the box says it's supposed to be a tiger. A few minutes later the boyfriend was over at her house and found her in the kitchen trying to put the puzzle together. "Honey," her boyfriend said, " why don't you go into the living room and relax, meanwhile, I'll put the frosted flakes back in the box."
Q: What do you call an unmarried Blonde in a BMW?
A: Divorcee'.
Q: What did you name the offspring of a Blonde and a Puerto Rican?
A: Retardo.
